


Filing a Complaint

by TheEmcee



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Bottom Eggsy Unwin, Complete, Desk Sex, Eggsy Unwin is a Little Shit, Established Relationship, Harry Hart as Arthur, M/M, Not Beta Read, Not Canon Compliant, Office Sex, One Shot, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn, Top Merlin (Kingsman)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:40:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23830969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheEmcee/pseuds/TheEmcee
Summary: Work has been keeping Merlin so busy that he's been neglecting his boyfriend's needs. Eggsy isn't okay with that.
Relationships: Merlin/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 73





	Filing a Complaint

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or the fandom
> 
> A/N: I recently watched the Kingsman films again and I felt the need to write some plotless porn. Feel free to leave a comment in the towel section down below and enjoy!

~...~

Filing a Complaint 

~...~

A knock came to Merlin's office out of the blue. Most of the agents were on premises and the few that were out in the field were in undercover or en route back; the only thing the agents at headquarters had to focus on was their mission reports. None of them needed assistance he would assume, but nevertheless Merlin wouldn't deny aid to anyone who sought it.

"Enter," he said. A second later, the door opened and Eggsy stepped inside, looking as lovely as he always did.

"Hello, Merlin. May I have a seat?" the younger man asked. Merlin didn't even look up from his tablet.

"Of course, Eggsy. Thank you for asking," he replied. 

It had taken a while for Eggsy to get into the habit of asking permission for such things, but Harry, and Merlin to an extent, were helping to shape him into a fine gentleman indeed. Yes, Eggsy had come a long way from the boy he had been during training and Merlin couldn't be prouder.

"Is there something you wished to speak with me about?" Merlin inquired before signing off on one of Percival's reports. 

"As a matter of fact, there is, sir," Eggsy said. 

Being addressed like that never failed to get Merlin's heart beating, even more so than it did whenever he merely gazed upon Eggsy. It wasn't exactly a secret that the two of them were together, but Merlin was a private man. He liked keeping his personal life separate from his professional one. However, Eggsy never made things easy and he loved seeing how much he could get Merlin riled up. But now wasn't the time. It has barely been half a year since the Golden Circle mission and there was still so much that needed to get done. 

"I have a complaint I'd like to file, sir," Eggsy finished. At last, Merlin looked up and met the young man's gaze.

"Is everything alright? Has anything serious happened? Did someone wrong you, Eggsy?" Merlin fired question after question.

Eggsy was an attractive and well liked agent. Many of the others, despite knowing that he's with Merlin, have accosted him, both before the Golden Circle and now. If anyone dared to lay hands on him without his consent, Merlin would be filing report and as much paperwork as would be needed to ensure the offender was punished, after he'd have a row with them himself.

"Why yes, someone did wrong me," Eggsy replied. He stood up and approached Merlin. 

Without asking, without apology, he sat on the desk directly in front of Merlin. Eggsy was nibbling on his bottom lip and Merlin wondered how someone could be so seductive without even realizing it. 

"You know how I take complaints, lad," Merlin said with mild hesitation. "Come and tell me who's hurt you."

"With pleasure," Eggsy leaned close to Merlin's left ear, so close that his lips were caressing it as he spoke. "It's my boyfriend."

Confusion shot through Merlin. HE had wronged Eggsy? But how? Had there been a family fuction or am anniversary that he'd miss? A birthday, perhaps? Merlin had been working quite a lot these past few months, but he always remembered important dates. Eggsy was his world; if there was something important going on, Merlin would have remembered.

"Is that so?" Merlin spoke quietly.

"Mhmm," Eggsy replied. "Y'see, he's been working his arse off so much that he's starting to neglect my needs. I can't tell you how many times I've tried to get him to bend me over the nearest surface and fuck me into oblivion, but he hasn't paid much attention to my efforts. It's disconcerting, really, and it's been making me feel unwanted. Unattractive even."

"I'm...sure this boyfriend of yours never meant to make you feel that way, Eggsy," Merlin said. 

"Oh, he isn't one to intentionally hurt me, sir," Eggsy said, and that work sent a jolt straight to Merlin's prick. "But work has been captivating him more than I apparently can. I was at a loss as to what to do, sir."

"Was?" was all Merlin managed to get out. 

Eggsy began to softly nibble his ear and Merlin's grip on his tablet tightened. He almost broke the damn thing, but Eggsy deftly removed it from his grasp with seemingly minimal effort. His hand then came to rest on the bulge forming in Merlin's trousers and the older man gripped the armrests of his chair. Merlin's breath was shallow and fast. All thoughts of reports and documents left his mind; the only thing he could focus on was Eggsy.

"Yeah. Y'see, I thought up this brilliant idea on my way here, sir," Eggsy continued. His breath was hot and wet against Merlin's ear; his lips were practically devouring the shell. "You can make it all up to me by fucking me right here, right now, on your desk."

Merlin wasted no time once those words were out of Eggsy's mouth. He shot up our of his chair, his larges hands cupping Eggsy's pert ass while his mouth captured Eggsy's in a reading kiss. With an animalistic desire, Merlin ravaged that gorgeous mouth, eliciting moans and gasps from it as his hands massaged the glorious cheeks he knew so well. Their bodies were pressed together, yet Eggsy was clawing at his jumper and the collar of his shirt, as if trying to meld them into one being. Those amazingly strong legs of his opened up and wrapped around Merlin's waist. Their groom's rubbed together, creating a friction so hot and exquisite that it was unbearable.

Nimble fingers worked on buttoning Eggsy's jacket while dexterous hands dove underneath Merlin's jumper and shirt and caressed the bare skin beneath. Once the jacket was carefully discarded, Merlin worked on the vest and then the shirt. The tie was thrown over Eggsy's shoulder. Merlin tore away from those sinful lips and kissed along Eggsy's jaw and neck before he began sucking and nibbling at his collar bone. Eggsy was moaning like a wanton whore the entire time, trying to grind against Merlin as much as possible to release some of the tension.

He howled in pleasure when Merlin lapped at one of his nipples before taking it into his mouth and sucking it gently. Merlin's hands moved down Eggsy's sides and to the front of his pants, giving the bulge there a featherlight caress before unzipping the clothing. Popping the button free, he tugged on the rim of the pants a few times. Getting the hint, Eggsy squirmed on the desk so that Merlin could tug them down to his shoes, his underwear following shortly thereafter.

The sight of Eggsy's hard, red, leaking cock and the blushed look to his body and face sent whatever blood Merlin had left in his brain to his cock. He reached for a drawer on his desk, the one where he kept supplies, just in case, but Eggsy stopped him. Even though he looked a right mess and was panting, he gave Merlin a sexy smirk.

"No need for that, Merlin. I've already prepared myself," he stated, sounding damn near proud of himself too.

"You cheeky, little-" Merlin was cut off by a kiss, one he was more than happy to return. 

Eggsy's graceful fingers wandered down to Merlin's trousers and released his glorious prick from its confines. He wrapped a hand around it and gave it a couple of good strokes before he pulled back.

"You'd better fuck me good and hard, sir," Eggsy told him before turning around and presenting his ass. 

And what a beautiful ass it was; pale as moonlight and without a blemish in sight. Soft and pliant. And it was Merlin's. His, and his alone.

Even though Eggsy had prepared himself, Merlin still grabbed the bottle of lubricant out of his drawer and applied a generous amount to his prick. Once he was properly ready, his hands spread those cheeks apart and he pushed in, slowly but not stopping until he was completely sheathed. He knew that Eggsy loved it that way; Merlin always brushed against his prostate when he was buried fully inside of him, and sure enough, a stream of babbled moaning begpan to pour from his lover's mouth.

Merlin waited for a moment, allowing Eggsy to grind back against him and allowing pleasure to envelope both of them, before he pulled out far enough so that only the tip remained inside. Without warning he thrust back inside, stroking Eggsy's prostate and hissing at how he clenched around Merlin, his body trying to suck him in deeper still, if that were even possible. 

Merlin snapped and jerked his hips, creating an unsteady rhythm and causing the desk to shift beneath them and the computers to move out of place. Vaguely, in the back of his mind, Merlin was aware of how bad an idea this was. Anyone could walk in on them, or worse, they could break one of Merlin's computers, or worse still, he precious tablet. But the lust and desire that was fogging his mind were too great to ignore, and Merlin was soon lost in them. 

Eggsy was clinging to the desk, clawing at the edges as every other thrust seemed to go deeper inside of him. He switched between chanting Merlin's name, 'Oh, God', and 'fuck, right there, yes!'. Positioned as he was, he couldn't reach his cock and stroke himself, Merlin neither, but he didn't need a hand on his aching memeber. More often than not, Eggsy would come just from Merlin fucking him, and with his prick brushing against the desk as Merlin pounded into his ass, today would be no different.

"Hamish....! Hamish, I'm... I'm close...!" Eggsy managed to moan out. A cup of pens and pencils fell onto the floor and scattered everywhere, but they didn't pay attention to that.

"Me too, Eggsy," Merlin growled against his ear, nibbling it. "Come with me, love."

One last thrust was all it took before both Kingsman reached their climaxes; Eggsy moaned loudly as he came on the desk, smearing his seen on his stomach as well while Merlin, buried as deep in Eggsy's body as he could be, filled him with his seed. Both men were panting and sweating as their tense bodies finished. Merlin relaxed against Eggsy's limp body, his lips pressing lazy kisses to his neck, ear, and cheek. Eggsy was panting, gazing dazedly at the wall, a satisfied smile on his face.

"Your complaint has been noted and filed," Merlin said, kissing Eggsy's temple. "I hope you're as satisfies with the outcome as I am."

"'M very satisfied right now, Merlin," was all Eggsy could say before he turned his head and met Merlin with a kiss.

A sudden knock at the door startled both of them, but before Merlin could pull out, it opened and Harry peaked inside.

"Oh, not again, you two," Harry sighed dramatically. "Hopefully you didn't break anything this time."

"Nothing appears to be broken, Arthur," Merlin said as he looked around. Eggsy beamed at Harry.

"How ya doin', Harry?" he asked.

"Well, my eyes need bleached out again. But other than that, I'm fine," Harry responded. "Once you two are done, I need to speak with the both of you."

"Why?" Merlin asked.

"Did something happen?" Eggsy inquired at the same time. When Merlin moved to separate them, Harry held out his hand and closed his eye.

"Please, don't! I have no desire to see that again," he said. He opened his eye and continued. "You two were exceptionally loud this go around. So much so that Gawain had filed a complaint. So, get presentable and meet me in my office." 

With that, Harry closed the door and left. Merlin sighed and shook his head while Eggsy laughed. The older man settled him with a half-hearted glare.

"This is the third time you've gotten me into trouble, Galahad," Merlin tried to sound stern but failed, as he was still buried inside of Eggsy's ass. Almost reluctantly, he pulled out and both of them immediately missed the contact.

"But it's Gawain this time. Soon, we'll have all the agents filing complaints about us," Eggsy beamed proudly.

"Is that your goal?" Merlin asked as he rummaged through a drawer for cleaning wipes and cloths.

"Is sure is, Merlin. Kind of like a Kingsman bingo," Eggsy answered, taking a wipe from Merlin and cleaning himself.

"As long as it doesn't get me fired, I've no objections," Merlin said. 

"As if Harry would fire us," Eggsy said. "I think he rather enjoys barging in on us." 

"He'd better not," Merlin growled possessively.

"Aw, you're cute when you're like this," Eggsy said before placing a kiss on Merlin's cheek. Once their clothes were back in place, he opened the door, a smirk on his face. "Shall we?"

Side by side, they walked to Arthur's office, laughing quietly as hardly any agent met their gazes.


End file.
